Of Health and Tomatoes

For those who may have been wondering where I've been, there's a brief update on my more personal blog, here: Twisted's Livejournal . Just a bit more crud in the health department that is clearing up, now that we've found yet another thing I need to keep out of my mouth to stay healthy. I will be known as The Incredible Reacting Gay-Romance Writer. I need a theme song or something.

However, my health is not what today's blog is about. Health fades to an insignificant dot, since I have discovered My Tomato.

I have been attempting to grow tomatoes for the first time ever this year. The plant limps along, just barely kept alive by a rather lackadaisical watering approach and the fact that I have let it roam free in my yard to forage for itself. But yesterday, it was discovered that the first fruit had begun to ripen. A pretty yellow color already, just ripe enough for a good fried green tomato recipe, so we picked it.

Then I really looked at it, and I suddenly realized that I am NOT obsessed with food as I had been thinking these last few weeks. Food is obsessed with me...

...or at least with my writing.

Don't laugh. The only way to explain how this tomato turned out is a food's secret gay porn obsession. Really. The fact that this is the very first tomato from a plant that Twisted Hilarity has actually planted is so apropos that I think the world actually paused a moment as I saw it, to highlight the perfection of it all.

This, my friends, is my Twisted Tomato.

I am making THEME pictures out of this beautiful phallic thing, I swear to god. Actually, I took so many pictures of it, I could now fill a gallery. I'm obsessed. My breathing is impaired. And I am so tempted to get some GI Joe doll and make him do terrible things with this tomato, it's not even funny.

If this does not spawn something utterly cracked and wrong in my writing, than nothing will. ^_^